Hope
by ErinNovelist
Summary: One-shot. Canon. When Merlin is on cloud nine due to meeting a certain Druid girl, Guinevere encounters just how happy it makes him and prompts the servant girl to dwell on her own relationship with a certain Prince Charming.


**PROMPT**: "There's something about you, Merlin."

* * *

**_Hidden Wallflower_**

Even through the closed door, I was able to hear the plunking of metal against metal from another room, accompanying a soft voice as it hummed an aimless melody. I recognized it as a ballad he had spent a lengthy amount of the last month's feast in awe about. Never before had I heard such a tone with him; it was quite a sight to behold, I assumed. He was probably flying past cloud nine, on route to cloud ten (only in those moments did he resort to humming). I vaguely wondered what made him so happy.

I stood in the alcove outside of the armory, admiring the carefree nature he waltzed around the castle with over the past few days. It had attracted many of the serving girls to question just who had made the ordinarily exuberant manservant to be in such a blissful state. I was not the only curious one; many had inquired about his current life happenings, and he merely shook his head with a smile and said, "_I'm better than I have been in a long while_."

His crystal orbs sparkled, and I could not help but marvel at the light in them. Light was currently streaming in through the windows and shining directly on the wall across from the opening of the armory. It just so happened at that current minute he choose to finish his chores within the room and step out into the corridor, the light surrounding him perfectly. Though I was certain it was designed to always envision a person in an angelic environment whenever they passed by the specific spot, I couldn't help but wonder if the sun itself wanted to join him in his happiness.

A feeling bubbled inside of me as I watched him stop shortly and leaning against the stone wall; elation crossed his face as he laughed lightly to himself. Anyone could tell how his heart was inflated and at any moment could lift off the ground and float away. Such a humble and selfless soul had finally found someone who could reward such loyalty; it was fitting - he had found his first love.

Even though I had known him for almost two years, everything about him was an enigma to me. His feelings were unreadable, expressions like shifting pieces of the crystal vase he had shattered in Morgana's chambers the other day after delivering her sleeping drought (not that she needed them now a days; she had finally found peaceful slumbers). We had no hopes of repairing the vase, but the pieces of his heart seemed to have been fit together. Like magic almost. He was sparkling, radiating with an emotion I had always witnessed but rarely felt.

The funny thing was that I still felt like I knew every side of him, perhaps not all the pieces, but the pieces he had chosen to share. Whenever they were made visible, I took a breath and memorized every aspect of his being, ingraining them into my memory. It was a rarity that he showed his true colors, and as he was one of my closest friends, I took the time to value each piece I gathered.

I had never seen him like this before. For a moment, I wondered if this was truly happening. Was he actually wearing his heart on his sleeve? It was someone who I had always aspired to be. No matter who I was or where I was or what rank I was, I wanted to be able to be completely and wholly in love without a care in the world. To feel like I could endure anything, stand up to anyone who dared to take my happiness away. To be in love with someone and not have to hide who I truly was. To be loved as equally as I loved them. To love Arthur and not be ashamed-

I shook my head, throwing my current insecurities and hopes away. I cast Merlin another gaze, smirking inwardly, wishing I could be like him. I didn't know who this person was to make him feel this way, so strong, vulnerable, and happy, but I wanted to meet her, learn from her. I wanted so much what Merlin had.

His voice carried through the corridor and I smiled as it travelled upwards to the heavens. I took a step out so I was in his line of view, and he broke out of his reverie to acknowledge my presence. I noticed that he held his head high in confidence and I wished I could peek into his mind and see what it contained.

I'd lost track of time, but five seconds later, I came to the realization that neither of us had made a move to voice our thoughts. His voice seized the humming in reality, but it continued in my head, which was perhaps why it took me so long to notice. I met his stare and waited for him to speak. He stood beside me, looming over, eyes roaming my face to gauge my expression. Now I was the mystery. Eventually, he dropped down on the stone bench alongside the wall, holding out his hand to pull me down.

With our eyes connected, I joined him on the bench, smiling. "So..." I trailed off, wondering what I should ask him. "Why are you so happy?"

He shook his head, grasping my hand softly, intertwining our fingers together. "I should ask you the same question."

"I mean, who made you so happy?"

To my surprise, his face clouded with confusion until he realized what I had requested. "Oh," he said. "What makes you think there's someone?"

"I know that look. It's how my father looked whenever he saw my mother. It's how the couple next door look at one another after a kiss. It is an expression you see when someone is in love, Merlin. People see you like that and then..." I drifted off, remembering the same expression on my face after Arthur had kissed me for the first time. "They know you're in love."

His eyes strayed from mine as he smiled in embarrassment. "I met someone," he muttered, "and she is... She's special, Gwen. She reminds me of you actually. She doesn't believe that people care about her, that someone like me could ever love her."

I let those words tumble around in my head, and I voiced my question after a moment. "What is that supposed to mean, Merlin?"

The corners of his eyes crinkled as he chuckled. "I've seen the way you look at Arthur, Gwen. I know, and I understand. I know you think he can't love you back but... Trust me, it'll work out somehow."

"I'm not fit to fall in love with him," I finally confessed, a blush creeping up on my cheeks. "He needs a princess, someone who can be his queen someday and everyone... No one will ever have doubts about how she rules or where she comes from. They'll love her."

He shifted closer to me, disconnecting our hands. "That will happen," he said, forcing me to look at him. "I promise it will. It will happen to you."

Whispering, I replied with a frown, "How can you promise something that destiny controls?"

"Because I know a few things about destiny," he told me, "and I know a few things about Arthur too. And... And I know you two are meant to be."

My fingers clasped his wrist as he continued to soothe me. "Give someone a heart to love and they're a master of relationships," I whispered.

He shook his head. "Anyone in sight can tell how you two feel about one another."

I gasped. "No... No that's not true, Merlin."

He held my gaze as the moments passed us by. "Maybe I can tell because I know you two quite well," he said very seriously. When I glanced at him quizzically, he only nodded in assurance.

"How do you know?"

"I don't know," he answered. "I can only , I had to quit doubting myself and just learn to hope. I need to believe things will happen. I need to take chances." He paused, his chest rising and falling steadily. "You've already found someone, and don't let them go. You have a good heart, Gwen." He paused suddenly as if he noticed the midday time, and he went rigid, smiling slightly. "If you can excuse me, I have somewhere to be. Have a nice day, Gwen."

With that said, he turned on his heel and left me alone in the corridor. I laughed when he disappeared from view and continued to amble aimlessly towards Morgana's chambers. I was lost in thought at Merlin's words, absorbing everything he had told me. He was right. I had found someone, and even if we couldn't be together in the sense that I wished us to be, all that mattered was that, here and now, we were together. And these were the moments which would carry on my heart no matter what happened.

I had hope.

Two days later, when I saw Merlin once more, expecting him to be exhuberant that the latest threat to Camelot was thorted so he and his love could continue to live in peace, I caught sight of him in the same armory, light dancing around him, yet crystalline tears cascaded down his pale cheeks. I didn't know what had happened to the bright man to revert him to the lost and broken boy, but something told me that Merlin's heart had broken.

In that moment, I didn't know what was going to happen in my, Arthur, or Merlin's future. I reckoned that we were bound to face pain, but there would be happiness. As long as our hearts beat, we were garunteed to keep living and suceeding. I felt it surging in my chest when I turned away from Merlin in efforts to leave him be, just to let him live, and I knew that it was true. Everything would turn out all right. Merlin's first love might not have worked out, but there would be others. I had hope. Hope stays with you as long as you believe in it, even when everything else disappears forever.

I had hope that Merlin would be happy again. I had hope that Arthur and I would have a chance.

I had hope, and that was all that mattered.


End file.
